All that I'm after is a LIFE full of laughter, as long as I'm laughing with YOU!

Jan 13, 2011

it is what it is

Reality bites sometimes, often it isn't pretty

This year I plan to be more honest in my scrapping. I feel led to show the realness of life. It isn't always pretty but it's our life the same. I don't feel like I can scrap pretty pages with only smiles any longer. There is alot of crummy stuff we deal with and I'm led to include some of that in my story/albums. We learn from hard times & mistakes. Sometimes we learn from others. Maybe we can learn something from each other this year.

It's be 15 days since I attempted suicide
for the 2nd time in 6 months
I spent 3days in ICU, 6 days in treatment &
I'm 7days out of the hospitals locked-down unit
that's my reality today.
And if you and I are REAL friends, none of that will matter.

13 comments:

Jessica said...

It is hard to be honest and even harder to be honest with yourself. I love ya and am always here for you.

Natacha said...

Angie, i had noooo clue. I'm so sorry to hear that you have been going through this. I am here for you to talk to, to vent to, anything you need just ask and i will help out in any way i can. I AM one of your FRIENDS!

big hugs
Tach
your fellow lollipop press dt member!!

Ziggyeor said...

I'm glad that you are still with us and I hope you continue to do well in the life you have ahead.

Michele's Scrapy Creations said...

Reality does bites! I know from experience. Get the help you need and if you need anything i'm here. I went thur a severe depression myself and try suicide. Take your time and heal. HUGS

Melissa Elsner said...

Wow. I am completely inspired by your honesty and willingness to share. Scrapbooking is so much more than just documenting the happy times. It's my way to creatively journal too. I love the idea of combining my most favorite hobby with journaling my life - both the messy and happy times.

I look forward to learning more about you! You might also be interested in checking out Scrapbooking from the Inside Out. It is a kit club but also a wonderful community. Our concept is digging into our inner worlds and scrapbooking those moments. It's powerful, hard work and therapeutic all at the same time!

http://scrapbookingfromtheinsideout.com

Tracy said...

Hugs to you.
Keep your chin up and my thoughts are with you and your family.

Pinky said...

I love being honest in scrapbooking, I know it scares some but it is so therapeutic!!!!
Happy you are with us and hope scrapbooking and being out loud helps!

Hey girl I am taking over Tallyscrapper you should come by and say hi sometime. ALOT of real people there who scrap it real!

Jodi Dolbel said...

Oh Angie!! Big HUGS to you and congratulations on your honesty! Maybe that honesty might be the thing that helps you most through the tough times!!
I agree, we have to scrap who we are and what we feel! Im a huge believer in that and some times people feel my pages are just a little bit honest for them, but who cares - scrapping is for us, not anyone else!
I have felt your pain in the past, ive never been able to go through with my suicidal thoughts, but many a time i laid in bed and wanted to jump in the car and drive off the look out. Once i even got in the car in the middle of the night and went up there.... But my love of my kids held me to the ground.
Your not alone in your struggle Angie, there are so many people out there that are struggling with the same things you are. I also am trying to loose 35 kilos this year and even loosing that i am still classed as obese! So many struggles to cope with, but with honesty, hope and love from your family im sure I prey that you are able to cope with life one day at a time.
Big hugs to you.

TLHarwick said...

{{{hugs}}}
I am inspired and in awe of your honesty and bravery! You are right, life can suck... I am saddened to hear that it got the best of you! I am glad you are ok and on the way back to being healthy.. hang in there.. there is always sunshine after the rain!

xoxo
Trish (Lollipop Press DT Friend!)

Casey Lu said...

My heart goes out to you and I am glad that you were honest enough to share on your blog. The last two years I had suffered from Postpartum depression and it got to that point a few times, and the time I started going off the deep end and almost attempted it, my hubby and children encouraged me to get help. I was so worried what others might think of me considering the fact that my life was going good other than I was depressed and didn't know why. I am glad I am still here and I am glad that you are too! I agree that we should put our not so great times in our scrapping, I have done it a few times and it helps. As you said life isn't always about the good, it is the bad too and how our tribulations help us grow stronger. I pray that you will have the strength to get through each day! I look forward to seeing more scrappy stuff from you! Glad to see your home and hanging in there. Hope to see you around!

Your lollipop dt friend,
Casey Lu

jo said...

Isn't it amazing how many people have felt suicidal. I would never have guessed. I know (from experience) that it is not something you feel you can share. People who have never had those unexplanable feelings of desperation and exhaustion just can't relate. Most of those assume it is due to some circumstance or one thing that leads us to the "Pit of Despair". At least for me it was proabably a combination of many things. Obviously I am on a med and doing much, much better. I am evened out so to speak. Just having read your honesty and the sweet comments and encouragement of others helps me. We all can feel overwhelmed and alone and maybe we just need to reach to other women for support more often. Yeah, I can sure take my own advise because I don't do that! I'll keep you in my prayers. Hugs! Joanne

Que Chula Cindy said...

I just came across your blog. Thank you for a non-pollyanna share. I'm inspired to do the black layout I've wanted to do and not keep it in my head and in my heart.

Thank you.

DeeDee said...

I hope one day to scrapbook the story of me... and it will have some very dark days and some very bright days... you are a brave soul Angie...but know you do have freinds you didn't even know where there.... just waiting for the time to be insink with you again...

be true to you and nothing else matters..

love yourself first , then the love of others come naturally..

big hug for you...